Crazy Funny Quotes
“Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more.”~ James Thurber
“The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.”~ Andy Rooney
“People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.”~ A. A. Milne
“People kept saying ‘Go Corona’ and it went to other countries to spread across the globe.” ~ Invajy
“Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.”~ Alan Dundes
“Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.” ~ Abraham Lincoln
“A woman is like a tea bag – you can’t tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.”~ Eleanor Roosevelt
“Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed. ”~ Albert Einstein
“My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.” ~ Caroline Rhe
“All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.” ~ Casey Stengel
More Funny Quotes
“At every party there are two kinds of people – those who want to go home and those who don’t. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other.” ~ Ann Landers
“Insomnia sharpens your math skills because you spend all night calculating how much sleep you’ll get if you’re able to ‘fall asleep right now.’” ~ Anonymous
“The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.” ~ Dorothy Parker
“A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.” ~ W.C. Fields
“I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.” ~ Rodney Dangerfield
“My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I’m right.” ~ Ashleigh Brilliant
“Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.” ~ Benjamin Franklin
“Have you noticed that all the people in favor of birth control are already born?” ~ Benny Hill
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” ~ Bernard Baruch
“Life is hard; it’s harder if you’re stupid.” ~ John Wayne
Source : https://www.invajy.com/funny-quotes-sayings/
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